Your Existence Gives Me Hope
by ALLY146
Summary: It's that time again, the time of year every kid dreads: the end of summer. Oliver and Lilly both long for something to happen between them before school begins. Will this summer finally be a summer to remember? Loliver twoshot. Rated T for mild language.
1. Part One

A/N: This is a little short story I started partly because I really wanted to write a Loliver and partly because I was feeling frustrated with summer coming to an end. It's a twoshot, and I rated it T for some mild language. This takes place during the last week of summer right before junior year. It's my first POV story so sorry if some of the verb tenses get mixed up or whatever. Reviews would be greatly appreciated. I'll put the second half up sometime in the next few days.

Anyway, on to the story. :)

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Your Existence Gives Me Hope

Oliver.

Six days, fifteen hours, and twenty seven minutes.

That's how long until my life as I know it is over.

Okay, so that's a bit of an exaggeration. But in six days, eighteen hours, and twenty.. six minutes I will be sitting in a classroom, half asleep, hating life.

Yes, I'm talking about school. The nightmare of every teenager, except maybe the pocket protector wearing nerds that live for chess club and extra credit.

Normally I can tolerate school. Though I don't always admit it, there are things I like about school. But now is just not a good time to be going back, for a few reasons.

Reason Number 1:

Two words. Summer. Vacation. Also known as my absolute favorite time of year. It's like summer was made for me. Everything I love involves summer. Staying up most of the night and sleeping in late the next day. The barbeques, the parties, the beach, bonfires.. everything about summer just makes me happy. It's like for a few months out of the year everything is perfect. I mean, isn't that how summer's supposed to be? Isn't that why virtually every kid in America, and probably the rest of the world, celebrates the last day of school and despises the first?

Reason Number 2:

Two more words. Junior. Year. Don't get me wrong, there are some plus sides to being a junior. I'm officially an upperclassman. I can drive to school this year, among other places. Everyone in my family gets a car a right before their junior year. But there are some downsides. First, the SATs. An extremely long test which I am so not prepared for. Second, college. College is pretty big in my family. My parents are both successful lawyers, and my older brother is on his way to med school. Even my seven year old brother is smart enough to have skipped a grade already. Let's just say I have a lot to live up to. So far, it's not looking good. My grades are less than average and in order to pick a college, I have to have some idea what I want to do for a living. Yeah, that might help a little.

Okay, all of this thinking is officially giving me a headache.

I closed my eyes and sighed, kicking off of the ground to make the hammock I was laying in swing again. I looked up at the sky and watched the clouds float by, my mind finally clearing of horrible thoughts of the nightmare I like to call school. It was funny how much this hammock calms me. It's been in my backyard for years, and whenever I'm feeling stressed or frustrated or confused, my trusty hammock always makes things better.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, enjoying the feeling of summer while I still could. The combination of the hammock swaying, the smell of summer air, and the warm sun casting down on my face made me so calm I didn't hear the approaching footsteps.

"Uh oh, what's wrong?"

I smiled, not even having to open my eyes. I knew who it was.

The real number one reason now is not a good time to be going back to school. Lilly Truscott. My best friend of twelve years and my secret crush for at least five of those years.

Right now you probably don't understand why the girl I've been crushing on for about one third of my life would make me not want to go back to school. You see, I met Lilly the summer I turned four. That summer literally changed my life, and I think that was when I fell in love with summer.

I've wanted something to happen between me and Lilly for a very long time. But I think if something is ever going to happen with us, it just has to happen during summer. Sure, I'm a guy, but even I know that big things are supposed to happen during summer. Summer is a time for changes, adventures, and romance. So every time school starts and nothing happens with me and Lilly, I'm always disappointed.

I opened my eyes and looked up at Lilly, squinting from the sun that was now shining directly in my eyes.

"What do you mean 'what's wrong'?" I asked, even though I knew the answer.

"Uh hello Oliver, you're in the hammock. We both know you only get on the hammock when something's going on up there." She tapped on my forehead. I laughed, hit her hand away, and swiftly wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her down onto the hammock next to me.

"Oliver!" she shrieked, playfully punching me in the arm. She snuggled in close and rested her head on my chest. Would she ever know that what to her was a simple friendly gesture made my heart beat faster than should be safely possible?

I studied Lilly, subconsciously playing with the ends of her soft, golden hair. Lilly was the true definition of a natural beauty, the type of girl who looked gorgeous in sweats and a hoodie but was also a knockout in a little black dress. Lately she had grown into herself and therefore captured the attention of many boys at our high school. Sure Lilly had started wearing a little more makeup and some girlier clothes, but she would always be the same Lilly that I used to play with in the sandbox.

Lilly looked down at my hand that was still twirling the ends of her hair. She shifted to her side and returned the favor by playfully ruffling my hair. I smiled down at her. If only she knew the thoughts that were going through my head. If only she knew the way I really feel about her.

---

Lilly.

"Why does summer have to end Oliver? Shouldn't a season as perfect as this last forever?" I leaned into him as we walked down the street. We went on walks like these a lot, and we always walked with our arms linked. People might typically think we were a couple, but the kids in our town knew better. I knew better too. I convinced myself a long time ago that nothing will ever happen between me and Oliver.

Even though it's what I want more than anything in the whole word.

Well, maybe not more than.. nope, never mind. I am fully convinced Oliver is the key to my complete happiness.

But like I said, it's not going to happen. I've learned to accept that.

That doesn't mean I can't take full advantage of being his best friend and cuddle up to him every once and a while.

Oliver sighed, brining me out of my thoughts. "I don't know Lilly. I wonder the same thing."

"I mean come on!" I exclaimed, pulling my arm away from Oliver's and running out into the middle of the street. "Look around! Everything about right now is perfect." I flung out my arms and spun around, taking in the sights, smells, feelings of summer while I still could. "What's the countdown now?" I asked, still spinning.

"Six days, nine hours, and twelve minutes." I groaned, partly because that was such a short amount of time and partly because I was getting really dizzy and just a little nauseous.

"Aren't you getting dizzy?" Oliver asked. He could always sense how I was feeling.

"Of course not", I lied.

"Well come over here anyway, for me? I'd really hate to see you get flattened by a car mid spin."

"For you?" Sigh. I'd do anything for him. I smirked. "Finee."

I stopped spinning and immediately stumbled. Whoa. I was way dizzier than I expected.

I slowly wobbled over to where Oliver was standing on the grass in front of some random house. He held out his hands to me, not even trying to contain his laugh.

"You.. can just.. shut up!" I said, unsuccessfully pretending to be mad as I staggered over. I was doing okay, but right when I grabbed Oliver's hands I fell forward to the ground, taking Oliver with me.

"Ow!" Oliver said before cracking up. I rolled off of him onto my back and looked up to the sky, laughing hysterically.

"Sorry", I said, in between laughs. I tried to pat him on the arm, but my dizziness made me miss and whack him in the face, an action which immediately sent us both into a second fit of laughter.

We calmed down after a few minutes, once we were all laughed out and we had tear streaks running down our faces. We were silent for a while, just lying next to each other and looking at the stars.

"Oliver?"

"Lilly?"

"Can you do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"Promise me that life will always be this perfect. That we'll always be as close as we are now." And maybe closer. Hey, a girl can dream.

Oliver reached over and took my hand in his. My heart practically jumped out of my chest.

"Lilly, I can promise you that nothing between us will ever change. And I will always be there for you whenever you need me, for whatever."

I smiled and looked over at him. His eyes were closed, but he was smiling at me.

"Enjoy it Lilly, drink it in. These are some of the best days of our lives."

And I did. But while Oliver was referring to summer, I was taking him in. As I studied his perfect face I became thankful he was in my life. No matter what, he would always be one of the most important people to me. Even if eventually things did change.

My eyes made their way down his face and landed on his lips. I was sure I would never kiss them, but I could still wonder what it would be like.

---

Oliver.

I wonder what kissing Lilly would be like.

Here I am, sitting in Lilly's backyard, supposed to be listening to some story about this hilarious thing that happened to her and Miley earlier today, and this is what I'm thinking. I've kissed a decent amount of girls in my lifetime, but none of those girls have meant anything to me. None of them even come remotely close to comparing to Lilly. Therefore none of those kisses have been that special. I'm pretty convinced that a kiss with Lilly would be hair raising, earth-shaking, get goose bumps it's so awesome kind of experience.. complete with fireworks.

Okay, now I officially sound like a girl. But guys can appreciate an amazing kiss too, right?

"Oliver!" Lilly's stern voice brought me out of my thoughts.

"Huh?" I asked, looking up.

"You haven't been listening to a single thing I said, have you?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips.

"Of course I have", I lied. "You and Miley, and then something about wigs.."

"You suck Oken!" she said, playfully punching me in the arm.

"Ah!" I cried, grabbing the part of my arm she had just hit. "Ow Lilly. Did you have to punch me so hard?"

"Shut up, we both know I punch like a girl", Lilly replied, raising her eyebrows at me.

"Damn Lilly", I said, faking a look of pain. "I .. I can't move my arm!" I pretended to try and lift my arm. Lilly looked at me curiously, confused.

"You know I'm going to have to get back at you for disabling my arm, right?" I asked, making my face look completely serious.

Lilly rolled her eyes, realizing where I was going with this. Before her eyes made their way back over to me, I stood up and slung her over my shoulder.

"Oliver!" she shrieked as I slowly made my way over to her pool. "What are you doing?" I just smiled mischievously. She tried to wriggle free of my grasp for a few moments before giving up.

"Oliver.. why are you going towards the pool?" she asked, seeing the grass of her backyard change into the concrete that surrounds her pool.

"Uh oh, this concrete is pretty slippery." I said, pretending to slide around.

"Oliver.."

"I'm having trouble staying balanced.."

"Oliver, you better not throw me in there fully clothed." I didn't really think about that, oh well.

I shifted Lilly so I had both arms wrapped around her waist and I was holding her up right up in front of me. It was like I was hugging her, but she was a foot off of the ground. I looked into her endless sea blue eyes and smirked. She managed to raise an eyebrow at me right before I jumped forward, sending us both flying into the illuminated pool.

I felt Lilly wrap her arms around me tightly for support as we gently collided with the solid pool bottom. I kicked off the pool bottom, sending us both upward above the water.

"I cannot believe you just did that." Lilly said, pulling away. "And I almost felt bad for punching you in the arm!"

"Sorry Lils", I said. "Forgive me?" I stuck my lip out into a pout for effect.

"You're such a dork", Lilly said, any source of anger leaving her face. A night swim will do that to you. She let out the amazing laugh that I live for and jumped on top of me, submerging us both underwater. We chased each other around the pool, yelling and laughing until the sound of my ringing phone interrupted us.

I groaned. Why does my phone have to go off now? I pushed my hair out of my face and made my way over to the pool's edge and the nearby table where my phone lay.

"Yeah?" I said into the phone, barely picking it up in time.

"Oliver?" It was my older brother Spencer. He was home visiting from college like he always does at the end of summer. It was nice having him around, especially recently. My parents have taken up arguing with each other lately to relieve stress from work or something. So whenever they get in a random fight, Spencer and I, along with our little brother Luke, usually just take off for a few hours until they have time to cool down.

"Hey Spence", I said. "What's going on?" Speaking of my parents, I could hear a fight occurring in the background. Crap.

"As you can probably hear, mom and dad are bitching at each other again. You should probably get home before they use you being out late to start another fight. Remember last time?"

I cringed. The last time I had come home late in the middle of one of their fights, my mom freaked out because she thought I needed more restrictions. My dad argued that I'm trustworthy and I should be able to have fun and be a teenager (a point I completely agree with, by the way). This spiraled into a huge yell fest where my mom felt my dad didn't side with her enough. It was pretty bad.

"Alright bro", I said with a sigh. "I'm on the way." I hung up and looked over at Lilly. She was floating on her back in the middle of the pool, her hair cascading outward from her face. She definitely made it hard to leave.

"Lilly Lou!" I yelled, using my childhood nickname for her.

She stood up in the pool and looked over at me.

"Yeah Ollie?" she said, grinning. She always loved those names.

"I gotta go, the parents are fighting again and I don't want to make it any worse."

"Alright", she said nodding. "Call me when you wake up?"

"Yeah", I said with a smile. I waved and started heading towards the gate that led to the street.

"Oliver?" Lilly called out from behind me. I turned around and saw she'd made her way over to the edge of the pool.

"Yeah?" I asked, admiring the way she was able to still look stunning even when her hair was soaked and tangled. Damn Lilly, what are you doing to me?

"If things with your parents get bad, you know you can always come to me right? My parents are still out of town, so you can call the house phone as late as you need to." Her cell phone had drowned in this very pool a week earlier.

"Thanks Lilly, it really means a lot." She smiled at me and nodded. I turned and continued walking towards the gate.

"Good luck", she called just as I reached it. I turned and waved, taking one more look at the secret love of my life before slipping out the gate into the night.


	2. Part Two

A/N: I'm going to get on to the conclusion of this story pretty fast, I just want to say a quick thanks to everyone who reviewed the first half. It made me super happy.  
But anyway, on to part 2! Reviews are still greatly appreciated.

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Your Existence Gives Me Hope

Lilly.

I don't know how long I stayed in my pool, just watching the gate Oliver had left through. I worried for him; lately his family life was pretty rough. He always seemed so strong, but I know that deep down his parent's fighting was affecting him a lot. I really want him to open up and let his feelings out soon. Otherwise I think everything will just be too much.

Once I was shivering and my fingers were completely pruned, I decided it was time I get out of the pool. I made my way over to the steps and quickly ran out. I sprinted to the house, being exposed to the summer air increasing the cold that had already come over me.

I quickly locked up the house and ran upstairs towards the bathroom, my teeth chattering extremely loud the whole time. I started a hot shower and peeled off my soaked clothes, discarding them in the sink. I slipped into the steaming shower and sighed, enjoying the warming feeling of the water hitting my skin.

I stayed in the shower for a long time, not being able to bring myself to leave the warm water cascading down on me. Finally when I felt the hot water begin to run out, I forced myself to turn the shower off and step out. I wrapped my favorite fluffy blue towel around myself and walked into my bedroom, taking a pair of polka dot pajama pants and a t shirt out of my dresser drawer. I toweled myself off and put on my pajamas, enjoying how comfortable they felt.

After towel drying my hair for a few minutes, I went over to the easel set up in the corner of my room and sat down. Lately I had taken up painting as a form of getting my feelings out and expressing myself at the same time. I had never been able to keep up with a journal, so my easel acted as my journal. Whenever I needed to let out what I was feeling, I sat down in front of my easel and painted.

I smiled as I heard a soft rain begin to fall. Rain always calmed me, ever since I was little. The sound of rain helped me with my art too. My paintings always tended to look better when I had the rain in the background to paint to.

I opened up the fancy art kit Oliver got me for my birthday and took out a few random tubes of paint. I squeezed a decent sized blob of each color onto a paint tray and I began to paint. I swept bold lines across some sections of the canvas and put chunky splotches in other sections. As I became more comfortable with painting, I had learned to not put too much thought into it. I just let my hand do what it wanted.

After a good bit of time painting I set my brush down, needing a break. I stood up and stretched, looking over at the digital clock that sat on my nightstand. 1:26. Wow, I had been painting for almost three hours. The rain had begun to fall more vigorously over that time. It had gone from a light drizzle to a heavy downpour.

I walked over to my bed and sat down on the edge. I always looked at my paintings from this distance, so I could get a different perspective on it. I was studying my painting, trying to determine how far I was with it when a tapping noise brought me out of my thoughts. I ignored it at first, assuming it was just a branch from the tree outside tapping against the window. When it continued, I took my eyes away from my painting and looked around.

That's weird.. it sounds like the tapping is coming from the door that leads to my balcony. That definitely can't be a tree. I stood up and slowly crept over to the door, nightmares of murderers that I had as a child making their way into my mind. I unlocked the door with my right hand and slowly turned the knob with my left. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

It was Oliver. A very soggy version of Oliver, but Oliver all the same.

"Oliver!" I cried, grabbing his hand and pulling him out of the pouring rain.

"It's about time you answered the door!" he said, shaking the water out of his hair like a wet dog. "I was knocking for like 10 minutes."

"I'm sorry", I said. "You know how I am with weird noises at night." Oliver laughed. "What are you doing here?"

"My parents had an especially loud and long fight tonight, and I couldn't leave with Spencer because it was raining so hard. I just had to get out, it was driving me nuts." He paused and looked away, as if he wasn't sure he liked showing any emotion about the situation.

"I'm sorry", I said, taking his hand in mine and giving it a light squeeze. "My parents are out of town a lot on business, but being in an empty house sure beats being in a house full of arguments." Oliver looked me in the eyes and smiled, as if he was thankful someone understood. We stood there for a few moments, before I noticed that he was dripping.

"Crap Oliver, you're soaked." Oliver looked down and raised his eyebrows, like he forgot how drenched he was. I led him out my room and down the hall. "Let's go get you dried off."

I went into my older brother Jack's pre-college room to get some clothes for Oliver to wear until his were dry. I grabbed a grey t shirt, some plaid pajama pants and a pair of boxers. The fact that Jack and Oliver were basically the same size was a big help. I walked back down the hall to the bathroom, grabbing a towel out of the closet on the way.

Oliver had taken off his shirt and jeans, stripped down to a white t shirt and boxers. He was wringing the clothes he wasn't currently wearing out into the sink, attempting to dry them as much as possible. I softly cleared my throat to get his attention and handed him the pile of clothes and the towel.

"If you want to just strip down and throw the wet clothes out in the hallway," I began, "I'll throw them in the dryer while you get changed."

Oliver playfully raised his eyebrows at me. "Okay..", he joked, reaching down to take off his t shirt.

"Whoa," I said holding up a hand. "You can wait until I get out in the hallway."

"If you say so", Oliver said with a shrug. I laughed and walked out into the hallway, closing the bathroom door behind me. I sat down to the right of the bathroom door and leaned against the wall, feeling a sudden rush of adrenaline. Oliver was in my house, it was late, and we were all alone. Sure we'd spent the night together countless times as kids, but this was … different. It made me a little nervous for some reason, but it was a good nervous. I liked it.

I was brought out of my thoughts by the sound of the bathroom door creaking open. Oliver's hand clutching a ball of his wet clothing stuck out of the opening in the door. He pulled his arm back and flung the clothes at me, managing to make them land perfectly on my head.

I pulled the clothes off of my head and went downstairs, putting them in the dryer. When I got back to my bedroom Oliver was already there, standing in front of my easel.

I immediately felt incredibly exposed. Typically my artwork was only seen by me. Someone else seeing my art made me feel more naked than well … being naked. But if anyone was going to see it, I didn't hate that it was Oliver.

"It's a work in progress", I said, feeling insecure. "I still have a lot to do."

"Lilly", Oliver said, not taking his eyes off the painting. "It's amazing."

I stood motionless for a moment, stunned. If it was possible to melt, I had just done it. I felt like I was just a puddle on my bedroom floor. Oliver, the person I care about more than anyone else in this world, likes my art. More than likes, he thinks it's _amazing._ **Amazing.** Oliver could never even begin to imagine how much that simple word meant to me.

---

Oliver.

How did I not know Lilly was capable of creating something as beautiful as this painting? It wasn't a complex piece of art. It was very abstract, mainly consisting of sweeping lines and chunky blotches of color. The thing that made the painting so amazing was the feeling you could tell was put into it. Just looking at it you could see that Lilly had opened herself up and put everything she had, everything she was into each stroke of paint.

"Thanks Oliver", she said as I tried to take in every inch of the canvas. I wanted to remember it. "That really means a lot."

I finally took my eyes off of the painting and turned to where Lilly was standing.

"I should be thanking you Lils. Without you I'd either be wandering around in the rain or lying in my room trying to drown out the sound of my annoying parents." Lilly gently rubbed my arm. A look of sympathy was evident in her eyes.

"You know I'm here for you Oliver. Seriously, if you need to talk or anything you know you can come to me." I nodded and walked over to her bed, sitting down on the edge of it.

"I would probably help if you did talk about it", she continued, walking over and sitting down next to me. "It can't be healthy keeping everything inside." I took a second to think about it. Was I ready to open up? If I were to expose myself completely to anyone, it'd be Lilly.

Okay, that sounded very wrong. But you know what I mean.

"It's just tough", I began after taking a deep breath. "Because my parents fight so much now it's weird when they're nice to each other. I mean, how sick is that? My parents' being nice to each other is the strange thing." I sighed and looked down. "Sometimes I just want them to get it over with and get a divorce. But then again I don't want my family to fall apart. And I feel like I have to be strong, especially for Luke. He's only seven Lilly, he shouldn't have to be surrounded by all that. And now that Spencer's off at college, it's even worse. It's all just too much to deal with sometimes." I fiddled with my hands, feeling a little insecure.

"Oh Oliver." Lilly pulled me into a strong hug. I tensed up at first, but then I let myself fall into her. Two words and a hug: a simple gesture that meant so much. Lilly encircled her left arm around my neck, her right arm around my back. She alternated between lovingly rubbing my back and scratching the back of my neck. I felt myself on the verge of tears, something that would normally freak me out. Now, I didn't even care. Lilly was here for me, and in her arms was the one place I felt I could let it all out.

We stayed in that perfect embrace for awhile, and I began to feel as if a huge weight was being lifted off of my shoulders. I had kept all of this conflict I was feeling inside my head for so long, letting it out was such a huge relief.

When we finally pulled apart, I sniffed, immediately aware of the couple tear stains on my cheeks. When I looked at Lilly, I saw she had matching tear stains on her face. She cares so much that she made my pain her pain. We locked eyes and she did it: the most perfect thing a girl could do in this situation. Lilly brought her hands up to my face and wiped the leftover tears away with her thumbs, bringing some of the pain that caused them with it.

I don't know if it's possible to pinpoint a certain moment when you fall in love with a person. But if it is possible, that was it. That was the moment I fell in love with Lilly Truscott.

Lilly leaned in and kissed me gently on the cheek, because she wasn't perfect enough already. (Notice the extreme sarcasm.)

"I know it's tough Oliver", she said, taking my hands in hers. "Well I don't **know**, but I can imagine. My parents aren't here… so if you wanted to crash here tonight, you know to have a break from your parents, it'd be okay."

I smiled and nodded. "That'd be great." She smiled and patted my knee before standing up. She went and turned off the lights as I pulled back the covers of her bed and lay down on my back. I felt her crawl into the bed next to me as my eyes adjusted to the darkness. We lay there side by side, both looking up at the ceiling. My heart jumped as I felt the back of her hand graze the back of mine. She slipped her arm around mine and took my hand in hers, interlacing our fingers. I don't know if it was a form of support or something more, but either way I was happy. Right there with Lilly was where I was meant to be, no matter what.

---

Lilly.

I sat on the bench on my bedroom balcony, watching the sunrise and thinking. Last night was definitely eventful. I don't really know how I'm supposed to feel about it. I feel like I got so much closer to Oliver last night, and I didn't think that was even possible. I gained so much respect for him, hearing him open up about his troubles and his feelings. I don't think he'll ever know how much it meant to me that I was the one he opened up to, the one he let comfort him when he needed it the most.

It's tough though, because being that close to Oliver just increased the already strong feelings I had for him. But I know that he needs a friend right now, so I'll have to fight off what I'm feeling once again.

It doesn't help much that I woke up this morning by his side, still holding his hand.

"Hey." Oliver stepped onto the balcony and sat down next to me, still looking a little sleepy with the most adorable bed head.

"Morning", I replied. "Apple juice?" I held out the large cup I held in my hands.

"Yum!" He took a sip, then handed the glass back. "Thanks." I set the almost empty cup down on a nearby table and sat back, taking in the multiple reds, oranges, yellows, and purples that blended together to make an impeccable sunrise.

"So Lilly, about last night" Oliver said, after we watched the sunrise for a little while in silence.

"Yeah?" I asked, butterflies forming in my stomach.

"I just wanted to thank you, you know for being there for me and everything. It meant a lot, more than anything. And I ..." I could see him tense, as if he was unsure if he had the courage to say what he wanted to say. Could this mean…? "Last night will always be incredibly special to me", he finished. Oh well, that's what I get for getting my hopes up.

I looked over at him and smiled. "I'm happy I could help." He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into a hug. It lasted longer than most hugs should, but I definitely wasn't complaining. I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes, just enjoying being close to him.

Wait a minute, what am I doing? Like this is going to help me get over Oliver. Being close to him was the last thing I needed right now. I didn't want to end up doing something I would regret later, like letting out everything I was feeling for him. That would not be a good idea right now, especially since he opened himself up so much last night. The last thing I want him to think is that I was taking advantage of him allowing himself to be vulnerable.

So I did the only thing I could think of, I ran.

"I.. I gotta go." I said, pulling away. I looked at Oliver for a moment, confusion was apparent on his face. I sighed and stood up from the bench. I walked inside to my bedroom and immediately started running. I ran all the way down the stairs, out the front door, and down the sidewalk, not caring I was still in my pajamas, not looking back.

Once I was about three houses down the street I slowed to a walk. This sucked. Everything about this situation sucked. There was no way to make this situation any less sucky. I kept walking, trying to clear my head. I cringed at the sound of approaching footsteps.

"Lilly!" Oliver yelled, still running. I stopped walking and turned towards him, knowing a confrontation was inevitable. Oh well, it had to happen sometime.

"What.. the hell… was that?" he asked, breathing heavily. He had stopped about five feet away. "Are you like about to start your period or something? I mean, can you say bipolar?"

I closed my eyes and sighed, he just had to make this difficult.

"In all seriousness Lilly, what's going on with you?" He said, his breathing returning to normal. "You just completely freaked out."

"I can't do it anymore Oliver," I said, looking down at my bare feet. "I just can't."

"Do what?" he asked, dumbfounded. I brought my hand up to my face and shook my head, frustrated. "Shit Lilly, just talk to me! What can't you do?!" Apparently Oliver was frustrated too.

Well, here it goes. It's now or never.

"You want me to talk to you Oliver?" I yelled, immediately shutting him up. "Fine, I'll talk to you. We have been best friends for what, twelve years? All those years you've been the most amazing friend a girl could ask for. And don't think I haven't enjoyed being your friend, because I have Oliver, so much. But I slowly began to realize that being your friend wasn't enough for me. I think I was about eleven when I realized I wanted more. I wasn't willing to sacrifice the friendship we had, so I've fought those feelings off ever since then." My voice had lessened to normal speaking level during that rant, but now it was gaining momentum again.

"And then last night you had to be all perfect and say my art, which no one else has seen by the way, was amazing. You don't know how much that meant to me Oliver, seriously. And then, you opened up to me and you let **me** be the one to be there for you and help you through everything you're going through right now. Oliver, I respect you so much for that. And I love that I'm able to like, support you through all this shit you're going through." I took a deep breath before saying those fateful words.

"What I'm trying to say is… I love you Oliver. I love you more than you could even begin to imagine. I love you with everything I have, everything I am, everything I hope to be." I felt tears begin to form in my eyes. Shit. "I didn't want to tell you, because I didn't want you to think I was taking advantage of you being vulnerable or something. But, I can't hold it in anymore." The water that was quickly filling my eyes was about to spill over. "That's what I can't do Oliver. I can't go on pretending that everything is fine and normal when truth is.. I'm head over heels in love with you."

I gave up on holding back the tears, I had exposed myself emotionally Oliver might as well see me cry too.

I blinked the tears out of my eyes, clearing my vision and letting them run down my face. Finally, I was able to look into the eyes of the boy I had just confessed everything to.

Oliver stood motionless for a moment. He studied my face, as if he was searching for an answer, an explanation, something. What else was there to know? Had I not just said it all? After what felt like hours of silence I finally had to look away. I couldn't take it anymore. More tears spilled out of my eyes as I realized I had just done it. With that long, slightly crazy rant I had ruined everything. I had completely screwed me and Oliver's twelve year friendship.

Or so I thought.

I blinked a few times, trying to clear my eyes again when I heard them. A few hurried footsteps. I looked up just as Oliver reached me. Oliver crashed into me, one arm wrapped around my waist, his other hand went up around the back of my neck, and his lips passionately collided with mine.

What followed was the most perfect kiss you could ever imagine. It was better than any movie kiss. It was the kind of kiss you would think you could only dream of. In that kiss years of stored up longing was finally released in a surge of passion.

When we finally separated, I rested my forehead against his. We both kept our eyes closed, not wanting to forget the moment we were in the middle of. We opened our eyes at the exact same time, and I immediately looked up at him. As I stared into the deep brown eyes of the love of my life, our feelings finally out in the open, I knew that everything was right. Finally, after so many years of lying to each other, lying to ourselves, everything was exactly as it was supposed to be. I was sure of this.


End file.
